ST. LOUIS — When "The Boss Baby" came out four years ago, it represented the perfect world for a big family heading out to the movies. Mature humor with some well-written jokes. Young kids would get to see a hilarious situation-with a science fiction underbelly-play out while their parents got to listen to seasoned voice actors such as Alec Baldwin, Tobey Maguire, Jimmy Kimmel, Lisa Kudrow, and Steve Buscemi. There were laughs and joy all around. "Boss Baby: The Family Business" strips all those good times away for 110 minutes of flat jokes, a discombobulated storyline, and far less laughter.
What's the story? The Templeton Brothers are all grown up and facing adulting issues, such as Tim's (hello, blank James Marsden) kids not wanting to share adventures with dad anymore and Theo (Baldwin) neglecting his brother and his family for world supremacy. But when a new Boss Baby agent arrives incognito, sparking a whole new adventure with the fate of the world (what else would be at stake) in the balance, the Templetons have to come together to save the day.
Here's the thing. The first one became bogged down only when the Boss Baby corporation scenes became too frequent. The good stuff existed back in the house with the organic concept of a son looking at a new baby as a threat and not a brother-and then finding out the infant talked. Not only did he talk, but the kid sounded a lot like the shouting guy from "Glengarry Glen Ross." Baldwin thrived in the role and picked up the rest of the timid cast, which mostly hit and miss. The first film has ingenious moments that invited all ages into the fray.
The sequel is tailored, unfortunately, heavily towards kids--or parents in an exceptional mood. I kept waiting to laugh and didn't. I'm the biggest Maguire critic, but I was wondering why he was so busy that even some part-time voice work was too much for him. Maybe he saw the script and concept, and decided to jump out of the plane and play some Blackjack instead. What we are left with is a slew of guest voices that won't immediately hit the brain, but few leave any kind of mark. Amy Sedaris, Eva Longoria, Jeff Goldblum all come to play, but the humor is missing. Marsden's list of charming and interesting qualities seems to shrink by the year. Baldwin is going through the motions. All signs of a sequel that didn't need to exist.
At least for me, it was. My wife and son watched and enjoyed what "The Boss Baby: Family Business" had to offer. I kept wondering why this film had to exist outside of money-making and boredom. With all the useless and needy aunt-type sequels flooding into theaters in order for chains and studios to recoup lost 2020 finances, I beg for more original stories. Here, the older Templetons aren't halfway as interesting and the baby adventures aren't as polished as they were four years ago. Director Tom McGrath and screenwriter Michael McCullers do their best to throw all the adolescent humor at the wall, but little sticks. There's so much going on at once with the story, as new characters come crashing in and older ones try to stay relevant. As the third act begins, a young woman breaks out into song, as if a musical was the remedy. No thanks. Just laughs. There are none.
By the time the credits rolled with Tim supplying us with a recycled message about getting older and rolling with the punches, I was ready to put on "Glengarry" to cleanse the movie palette.